Ashes...

Oh that 'Rebel sigh'...

The emptiness turns me again to You. Remembering the old hymn,

Teach me to feel that Thou art always nigh;
Teach me the struggles of the soul to bear-
To check the rising doubt, the rebel sigh;
Teach me the patience of unanswered prayer.
(George Croly, Spirit of God Descend Upon My Heart)

~*Elisabeth Elliot, Passion & Purity*~

What is one to do when the Lord calls for the spirit to be silent? When waves of soulish tides rise and challenge, while the flesh aches and pants for answers it knows only God can satisfy?

The hope is always there that God will answer our prayers. It might not be that, I knew, and I realized that the deepest spiritual lessons are not learned by His letting us have out way in the end but by His making us wait, bearing with us in love and patience until we are able honestly to pray what He taught His disciples to pray: Thy will be done. Acceptance of whatever that means is the great victory of faith that overcomes the world. The dairy records a prayer asking to be led higher. Was this the answer to that? If so, I need more grace, for heart and flesh were feeble. (Elisabeth Elliot, Passion & Purity)

ROAARRR!!! Been busier than busy lately... So much happening, so much to do, seriously, is really not funny. And what do i do at times like this? WASTE TIME!!!! *Scolds self: Blogging, Janfaye? Seriously? BLOGGING?!?... And that's the least of it. Check out the list of to do's for the semester and what i am doing:

MUST...

• complete an average of 2 portrait paintings a week.
• complete and average of 2 storyboards a week.
• Get the midpoint review stuffs- book, animatic, (re-worked) storyboard DONE and ready to go within the next week!!!!!!
• SURVIVE!!!
• keep room / kitchen in order while juggling insane schedule.
• remember to stock the fridge, laundry, pangsai, exercise, shower, sleep, pray, erm... breath? AAaaAAaaAAaaaaaaa...........
• GET A JOB! (great! like not enough work already)
• work out the car fund, get California driver's license! 
• figure out why the stupid computer keeps crashing. ROAR!!!!
• WAAaaARRGH!!! Claws face out... pokes someone in the eye... (yes! it is advisable to stay within arm's length from Janfaye at this momentary bout of spontaneous, unpredictable violence XD)

and then, there's time-wasting STRESS RELIEF!

• Blogging at 4am. HELLOH! Janfaye... waking up at 4AM to work? Budden, what am i doing instead?!? BLOGGING! Such a clown!!!
• Escapism extravaganzaaa... Laughing babies, funny babies, Lots and lots of BABIES!!!

HARHAR... Doped kid XD

• and finally, the dumbest games ever that for some strange reason are incredibly relieving and ADDICTING!!!: 

  So, first it was... 
  
  

  And then there was...
  
   Play The Impossible Quiz

  And now...

   

  VIRTUAL BUBBLE WRAP!!!! Gosh! i'm hopeless!

Now, GET BACK TO WORK YOU SLACKER!!!

Psalm 44:18 [NEB]: " We have not gone back on our purpose, nor have our feet strayed from Thy path. Yet thou hast crushed us as the sea-serpent was crushed and covered us with the darkness of death."

I wait.

Dear Lord, Thy ways

Are past finding out,

Thy love too high.

O hold me still

Beneath Thy shadow.

It is enough that Thou

Lift up the light

Of Thy shadow.

It is enough that Thou

Lift up the light

Of Thy countenance.

I wait-

Because I am commanded

So to do. My mind

Is filled with wonderings,

My soul asks "Why?"

But then the quiet word,

"Wait thou only

Upon God."

And so, not even for the light

To show a step ahead,

But for Thee, dear Lord,

I wait.

(Elisabeth Elliot, Passion & Purity)

Words Of The Day

pangsai (Hokkien): bodily waste, stool, feces, dung, poo-poo, poopsies... you get the picture.